England went into pandemonium when a law was finally passed for shops to start charging 5p on bags. There were so many interesting videos on the internet on how people carried all their shopping in their handbags or picked up a fight in order to avoid the 5p charge on each carrier bag. What I am waiting to see is shoppers doing it the African way by balancing their shopping in a big bowl on their head just to save a couple of round silver coins.

One will be wondering by now what the charge on carrier bags has to do with parenting. I believe that there are so many lessons for us to glean from as we journey through the walks of life and interact with society, people and sometimes animals. We only need to put our parenting hat on and have the eye of the eagle that sees beyond what the natural human eye can see, whilst observing nature, rules and sometimes principles that govern society.  I marveled at the way we as a society responded to the above law and how we quickly got over the initial inconvenience and adjusted very well within a short time.

During my parenting session on the topic of discipline, I start by asking parents what word comes to mind when they hear the word DISCIPLINE? The most common words that they come up with are strict, rules, punishment, naughty corner and boundaries, to mention a few. While these words play their part in disciplining a child, the root meaning of discipline in Hebrew is to TEACH. As soon as a parent has it in mind that he/she is meant to teach the child, that is, to inspire, challenge and encourage them to be relevant in their generation, there is a complete turnaround in the way discipline is carried out and also received.

Let’s go through the process to find out how the government or policy makers managed to teach a whole country to be more ecofriendly.   

Explain the reason for change.
For effective discipline or teaching to take place, there needs to be an explanation and discussion on the topic of change and its importance to the family values and beliefs. For instance, in the case of the 5p charge on bags, the government stated that in England alone, 200 million more plastic bags were handed out in supermarkets and Campaigners argued that the bags blight streets, spoil the countryside and damage wildlife, seas and coastline.

• How people reacted

I am very sure that the policy makers were very much aware that even though people were opposed to the idea, the benefits far outweighed the risks and for anything substantial to be built, there had to be a level of tenacity involved. Parents, we need to be willing to invest time and effort in the foundation of our children even more so when you believe that your children are meant to be world changers. You cannot just give in because they are throwing tantrums. Consistency is key to effective discipline because kids of every age are smart and very adept at sensing indecision or wavering in parents. If a child thinks for one second that they can get away with an offense, they will try it. I know being a consistent disciplinarian can be overwhelming but there is no short cut to excellence. In this soup-in-a-cup instant age we live in, sometimes parents, for the sake of peace or saving time choose the easier option of not dealing with issues at home in order to avoid confrontation with their children.

• Subsiding of tantrums

Children grow up more secured in themselves when the reigns are tighter and boundaries are clear. Tantrums will not last forever. It’s just a child’s way of expressing his or her feelings of discomfort and their natural desire to be selfish. It is imperative that a parent will have the patience to walk alongside the child during this phase as they learn to be content with little or much and to value life including themselves.  

• Life skill acquired

Within a short time shoppers like myself, have got the message that there are no free bags so they either come prepared or be ready to pay for bags. It reminds me of the story of the 3 little pigs who were running away from the wolf who huffed and puffed and blew two of their houses down until they were safe in a house that was made with bricks. The difference in the houses was not the soil on which the houses were built but rather what the houses were made of. The morale of the story is that if a child is taught the right things, their strength, tolerance, wisdom and their ability to deal with opposition in society increases. We need to be disciplined and persistent enough to keep digging until we reach the rock because it will be worth all the hard work and the struggle. Imagine a society with no rules or with rules that are not enforced. It will be like a city with no traffic lights, zebra crossings or speed limits. Simply chaotic! That is exactly how a home without rules or discipline will look like.